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First, I'm the type of person that isn't comfortable talking or writing about myself. I've always considered myself a private person and I have a bit of that old Yankee pride that makes it hard for me to ask for help. So writing the following does push me out of my comfort zone, but its my story and people are interested, so I will try to explain what happened from my point of view. To lose a furry friend is hard for anyone. Most of us outlive our pets and have experienced the pain before, but what happened to me and my family on April 14th was quite simply devastating. A guy had come over unannounced to drop off some tools because he was going to build a goat shed for me. I had been upstairs, madly trying to find my health insurance card so I could finish up my taxes and start my first vacation in two years. I came downstairs to show him where to put the tools, when I heard my roommate, Ella, saying “No, no, no”. I later learned from her that he had opened the door to the driveway and let the dogs out... he later explained that he didn't know they couldn't go out..... I wish he had thought to ask first but it's too late now. Three of our four dogs went racing down the driveway. I'm sure they had huge grins on their faces, psyched that they were allowed to go out for a romp unattended. As they rounded the goat paddock at the end of the driveway, they headed across the road to a huge field on the other side. Unfortunately, a car was right there and struck all three of them. We didn't know initially if Daisy had been hit or just so scared by the incident that she ran off into the woods. What I did know was that she was nowhere to be seen. By the time I got out to the driveway and looked down to the end, John (my ex) and the driver of the car, were both on their knees in the road hands over their faces crying...or in disbelief. Tess, my little sweetheart, laid splayed out in the road while King was trying desperately to drag his body to the side of the road. I instantly went for my van knowing that every second counted. I do not have rear view in the van and it's a narrow driveway. When I started to back down the driveway, it was all clear but just a few feet later I hit something. I stopped, jumped out of my van and found John lying on the side of the driveway. I hate to admit it now but I was mad. I was thinking what the heck were you doing? How the heck did you get from the road to behind my van and why in the world didn't you get out of my way? Later I learned from my neighbor across the street who just happened to see everything unfold, that John was walking up the middle of the driveway with his hands over his face as he was still crying. John later explained that this is what had in fact happened. He said that at the last moment he saw blue (the color of the van) and turned away towards the left, thus his right shoulder took the hit and knocked him to the ground on the side of the driveway, breaking his clavicle. As he lay on the ground I called to him... I heard a moan and someone else yelling “Call 911!”. Knowing that he had help on the way, I got back in the van and continued to get the dogs. If I could take back just two minutes, it would be to have just sat there and held Tess as she passed. It only took 5 minutes to get to the vet and she didn't make it. I found her little body all mushed up in the corner of the van when I got to there...she had passed. I so wish I could have those minutes back so she could have passed in my arms instead in the cold metal cage of my ACO van... but she did and there's is no going back. King was still alive, barely, so my focus switched to him, but I was clearly devastated by losing Tess. King was in shock and unable to move on his on. He had lost his vision as well. It was hard to tell what was broken but the vet didn't think he was going to make it. And after all, it was 5:45pm, she would be closing soon so I would have to take him elsewhere. She is no longer my vet...not just for this reason but her cold response was my last straw. At some point I had called Eileen Cashman, my very good friend and the ACO for Amesbury, where I live. With her assistance, we got King to the emergency vet in Brentwood NH. That night there was little they could do. We prayed that the internal bleeding would stop and prepared for the worst. He spent the first night on an oxygen tank. I don't think anyone there thought he'd make it either. That first night cost $3,000. Meanwhile, John, Ella and my daughter were all at the emergency room. A few neighbors went out in search of Daisy and a couple stayed behind at the house in case Daisy showed up. But nothing. No sighting. She had just disappeared. That's how the first couple of hours went and Tess was dead...I couldn't believe it...I didn't want to believe it. She was my very best friend in the whole world and I still feel like I'll miss her forever and its been over six weeks since I lost her and the sadness I feel hasn't subsided. |
